I love to way you're putting this. I too try to use this "jealousy" (I'm not sure it's the right word, maybe "envy"?) as a driving force to put myself out there and work harder or be more effective. I think sharing works from other illustrators is a great way to overcome this emotion. Engaging also. Being part of the community makes it all less negative.
I agree with all of this! My critique group and I talk about jealousy from time to time and how it is an excellent way to direct your energy. Feeling super jealous of something? That shows you really want it too! So, that’s how I know where to focus my efforts. Celebrating others also helps too. It’s excellent advice. And, it’s true, at least for me. I am happy for them. I don’t want them not to have the thing. I just also want that thing too. So, I’ll keep going. The minute I’m not jealous, I know I can call it quits in that area.
I’ll also be in Bologna this year - say hi if you see me around!
I'm jealous of how good your jealousy post is, Kayla!!
The great @DebbieOhi had a comic about jealousy, and it gave me a lot of comfort seeing all the ways jealousy can spring up. Like even established authors being envious of brand new authors getting attention!
What has helped me most is running at top speed towards anyone who makes me jealous, AND complimenting their work.
You know I'm nodding vigorously in agreement! 😂 I usually feel more deflated than jealous, but I think all those "negative" emotions live in the same shitty neighborhood. I totally agree (and I was just chatting with someone about this just this week) that pushing other people up and sharing what inspires me in others will reward you in some cosmic, karmic, kismet-esque way. You're a really great, supportive friend to me and that never goes unnoticed. 💙
PS: I was green with envy over your Richard Scarry cars!
Oh wow it’s like you’re in my head! I do always try and comment positively when people share their good news as I feel it helps me deal with it and it’s the nice thing to do. But recently I’ve felt myself avoiding Instagram because I don’t want to see anymore. I know I’m retreating and that I’ll start to feel isolated. This post has given me the jolt I need to use my envy to push myself forward. Thank you Kayla!
I love this post and identified with so much--esp. the "NEED TO CONTROL MY DESTINY" part! FWIW, it helps me so much when I remember to (as much as I can--I'm only human!) steer my jealousy slowly toward achievements, rather than individual people. I do find that lets me channel in a more "directional" way, if, for example, I can then say, "I'm so jealous of that award! And I'm even jealous that they get to say that they are award-winning in their bio!" I can't "solve" a person jealousy problem, because I can never be someone else. But focusing on me being jealous of an award (vs. the person) might makes me think: what award can *I* apply for, like the SCBWI WIP ones or whatever, which is so much easier to deal with, and constructive. And, also then I can cheer more honestly? (Because I love the person--even if I'm steaming hot jealous of their most recent incredible achievement?)
I am probably talking nonsense, but I also 100 percent use ongoing draft Substack posts to journal, and (obviously) also love to work through things out loud. 😂
Thank you for sharing! The hunger for validation in the arts can be overwhelming at times. You're often working by yourself, compensation can be low and those outside the industry don't really understand. It's no wonder we have these feelings creep in. It's a relief to know you're not alone :)
Thank you for the shout, Kayla. I found my post cathartic to write and the community of people who felt the same way was helpful too. I’m still with ya on all of this
I love to way you're putting this. I too try to use this "jealousy" (I'm not sure it's the right word, maybe "envy"?) as a driving force to put myself out there and work harder or be more effective. I think sharing works from other illustrators is a great way to overcome this emotion. Engaging also. Being part of the community makes it all less negative.
I agree with all of this! My critique group and I talk about jealousy from time to time and how it is an excellent way to direct your energy. Feeling super jealous of something? That shows you really want it too! So, that’s how I know where to focus my efforts. Celebrating others also helps too. It’s excellent advice. And, it’s true, at least for me. I am happy for them. I don’t want them not to have the thing. I just also want that thing too. So, I’ll keep going. The minute I’m not jealous, I know I can call it quits in that area.
I’ll also be in Bologna this year - say hi if you see me around!
I'm jealous of how good your jealousy post is, Kayla!!
The great @DebbieOhi had a comic about jealousy, and it gave me a lot of comfort seeing all the ways jealousy can spring up. Like even established authors being envious of brand new authors getting attention!
What has helped me most is running at top speed towards anyone who makes me jealous, AND complimenting their work.
Yay for cheering on others, and Yay for Bologna!!
You know I'm nodding vigorously in agreement! 😂 I usually feel more deflated than jealous, but I think all those "negative" emotions live in the same shitty neighborhood. I totally agree (and I was just chatting with someone about this just this week) that pushing other people up and sharing what inspires me in others will reward you in some cosmic, karmic, kismet-esque way. You're a really great, supportive friend to me and that never goes unnoticed. 💙
PS: I was green with envy over your Richard Scarry cars!
Oh wow it’s like you’re in my head! I do always try and comment positively when people share their good news as I feel it helps me deal with it and it’s the nice thing to do. But recently I’ve felt myself avoiding Instagram because I don’t want to see anymore. I know I’m retreating and that I’ll start to feel isolated. This post has given me the jolt I need to use my envy to push myself forward. Thank you Kayla!
I was feeling it particularly yesterday. Thanks.
I love this post and identified with so much--esp. the "NEED TO CONTROL MY DESTINY" part! FWIW, it helps me so much when I remember to (as much as I can--I'm only human!) steer my jealousy slowly toward achievements, rather than individual people. I do find that lets me channel in a more "directional" way, if, for example, I can then say, "I'm so jealous of that award! And I'm even jealous that they get to say that they are award-winning in their bio!" I can't "solve" a person jealousy problem, because I can never be someone else. But focusing on me being jealous of an award (vs. the person) might makes me think: what award can *I* apply for, like the SCBWI WIP ones or whatever, which is so much easier to deal with, and constructive. And, also then I can cheer more honestly? (Because I love the person--even if I'm steaming hot jealous of their most recent incredible achievement?)
I am probably talking nonsense, but I also 100 percent use ongoing draft Substack posts to journal, and (obviously) also love to work through things out loud. 😂
Thanks for sharing vulnerable feels bc I've definitely felt aaaaall this!
Thank you for sharing! The hunger for validation in the arts can be overwhelming at times. You're often working by yourself, compensation can be low and those outside the industry don't really understand. It's no wonder we have these feelings creep in. It's a relief to know you're not alone :)
I'm really excited to hear how Bologna goes!
I'm jealous of your extraordinary ability to draw birds! Mine always look like blobs with ill-fitting beaks!
Thank you for the shout, Kayla. I found my post cathartic to write and the community of people who felt the same way was helpful too. I’m still with ya on all of this